People who try to learn hoodoo via the internet tend to lack a basic structural understanding of conjure. They see small, bright "rules" or "dos and don'ts" and seek to apply them to entire classes of spiritual work where they are not applicable. One question that comes up in this way concerns a person who has set a honey jar with a candle on it, and has been lighting small candles in runs -- when, out of the blue, a family member or friend shows up and sees the jar and the candle. Now what? Is the spell "ruined"? Has the jar been "killed"?
Well, i know of no traditional, old-time worker who would say that a honey jar must be worked in secret or it is killed.
The honey spell with a candle on it is a hybrid of two types of spells. It is a sweet spell and it is a candle spell at the same time. This is a fairly common hybrid, but it is a hybrid. So let's look at the notion of "privacy" or "secrecy" in the two spell families from which it derives:
1) Some forms of sweet spells (for instance sugar bowl spells at the breakfast table, sugar packet spells at the office, or prayed-over sugar used in cooking) are inherently going to be seen by the public. Thus we undertstand that although sugar and honey may be used in sneaky tricks, these tricks are rarely private spells.
2) Candle spells may be worked in private (alone in a room), right out in the open as sneaky tricks (as when dressed candles are used for dinner ambient lighting), or in public (as at a Spiritual Church candle service). Thus we understand that candle work may be suitable for use in private work or in sneaky tricks, but it may just as easily be conducted in public.
Perhaps the querent somehow confused instructions about mojo hands -- they must not be seen or touched by others or they are killed -- with either candle spells or sweet spells, and now worries that letting someone see a honey jar spell with a candle on it inherently destroys the work ... but such is not the case.
I am adding this information to my "Hoodoo in Theory and Practice honey and sugar page online here:http://luckymojo.com/honeyjar.html
Thanks for asking and allowing me to reply.