So I have not posted in quite a while because, fortunately, my life has been pretty darned good. I married the love of my life in July of last year and we are raising his 3 kids from his previous marriage (ages 10,12, and 13) But, unfortunately we now have a problem.
The ex wife is a deadbeat mom. She has never been there for the children and if she shows up it's about once every 3 months for a few hours. My ex and his wife divorced in March 2011 after several episodes of her cheating (the youngest isn't his). She received domiciliary status in the joint custody decree. In June 2011, she left the kids with my husband and never came back to get them, but she still expected him to pay her monthly support (there is no order in place for him to do this, he was doing it because the children lived with her at the time). He stopped paying her and she floated about life, mooching off others and living with her boyfriend and several other males. When the children would visit her, she would shove them all in one bed in a room and ignore them until it was time for their dad to pick them up. (She was always out of gas and could never pick them up or drop them off)
Fast forward to 2014, I meet my husband and come into the picture. Ex wife started on me from the moment she learned of my existence. She told the children I was the reason she and their dad broke up, that I was the reason they would never be together and that I hated her. None of this is true of course and can be proven. In March 2016, we had a Consent Judgment drawn up that changed domiciliary to my then fiancé, and outlined visitation with the mother as well as her share of medical expenses. She signed it and pulled another disappearing act. When she finally resurfaced a month later, she lied to the children again and tried to extort money from my husband. It didn't work, but it put the kids under a lot of stress. The only good thing was that she started showing up on a more regular basis, taking the kids every other weekend, but only for one night. She refused offers of extra nights and getting payment from her was a painful process.
In December 2016, she vanished again. This time, never to return. She told my husband she didn't want to see the children anymore. Ok, fine. We got sole custody because that was outlined in the consent judgment. If she bailed again, she lost custody. She signed not one, but two affidavits stating she was giving up custody. She then proceeded to tell her family that we forced her to give up the kids and were keeping them from her and turned them against her. None of this is true either. Two weeks ago, her sister contacted me and ripped me a new one over emails until I started sending her proof of her sister's lies. The family now understands that all of this has been manipulation and lies from the ex wife. I am now on amicable terms with the family, but the ex maintains that we have forced her to give up the kids.
We now have Child Support Services involved and are going for child support from the ex wife, who refuses to hold a steady job and at 34 years old is still mooching off anyone that will support her. Her current sugar daddy is a man in Georgia who she is in the process of moving in with. (We live in Louisiana). The ex's sister actually contacted him and told him everything that has been going on and what her sister has done, including that her sister cheated on him. His response is that my husband and I are trying to burn the ex for no reason other than jealousy, that I am a "controlling bitch with insecurity issues" and if the ex was so horrible, that I should adopt the kids. (That will NOT happen because I believe that decision should me mine and I won't do that without a lot of praying and soul searching) So, in essence, they are both garbage individuals. She signed away the kids and he took her to Disney to celebrate.
There is a lot more that has happened, but that would take days to write, so this has been the cliff notes version.
What I would like to happen is for us to get a favorable judgment on child support, to break up the ex and her boyfriend so she has to come back to Louisiana, (would make things easier), and for her to stop lying about my husband and I because defending ourselves has become almost a full time job. Lastly, I need some suggestions on how to protect and help the kids spiritually, mentally and emotionally. This has taken a toll on them too and I can only imagine what is going on in their heads at this time.
I am trying to get this started early because we are in the beginning of the child support claim and have not been assigned a judge or court date yet. Any suggestions would be appreciated.
Thank you Saint Martha, Saint Jude and Saint Anthony! Words are so small!!!!