Post
by blessedbe » Mon Nov 28, 2016 2:43 pm
I am not sure if this question has been asked before - I have tried a quick search and could not find any info. Please guide me accordingly if a solution to something like this has been discussed before.
My husband and I have a "friend" in our small group who I strongly believe is fixing to break us apart. This person has tried to approach me during when I was single, however, the answer from me has been always very clearly and sternly, a NO. No flirtation, no lead-ons - always a no, for which this person has teased me a lot over the years.
When I met my husband and he was introduced to this group, him with his quiet and considerate demeanor also accepted him along with everyone as we would never want to create drama/rift amidst the group and generally like to keep to ourselves. We know what this person is like and we just avoid it as much as possible. Everyone else in the group and we are friendly, happy, and positive and we all try to not focus on this person's moderate occasional "joke" threats.
However... Just after we got engaged, he mentioned here and there about how he can make my then fiance "disappear like a match stick only if he tried! haha!". Then for christmas, he proceeded to give us a large jar of chilli oil sauce thing he said he made himself just for us. No one else in the friend's group received this gift.
I had a strong suspicion and followed by gut instinct about it - something told me that this was not right. I threw it away in our sink and told him that the bottle had broken. He was extremely upset and said he will make another batch but needs time. I told him no thank you it's ok. `
After I threw that oil down our sink, within a day, my husband and I, had a huge fight across our kitchen counter over wedding and being together. Him and I NEVER ever fight in this manner. It's usually a discussion sitting down. This man had just proposed and there were no concerns he had raised regarding some of these non-existing issues but all of the sudden our kitchen was a war zone. We went through it for a few weeks and eventually through some peace and serenity work, we are back to being exactly where we were - happy, considerate, on the same page, and incredibly in love.
Earlier this year, we were married. To that, this person said that he was surprised we went through with it but "hey even trump could be president LOL". We did not speak to him further.
As of recently, we are having a small friend-get together and while we did not invite this person, another friend had and this man has immediately jumped up and down and sworn that he has missed us so much, he can't wait, and he is so happy we are inviting him. We didn't. But we, as a couple, don't like conflict at all, so we said sure.
Now here's the problem: He has again offered to bring chilli sauce, oil and various other condiments like this for the party. It's strange because this is not his "hobby" nor does he typically offer this type of "gift" to other friend's or events. I tried to change the situation and asked him to bring a dessert or something rather, but he has insisted that because "the jar broke last time, I will bring us one of those" and also other sauces. He apparently has already shopped for these items.
He is refusing to back down and I am terrified this is another horror he is hoping to unleash in our home. He also mentioned that he will bring different types of bread so "Everyone will get to try it out the same night!" and I am concerned I can't stop this. Please help me defend myself from this menace.
I should also mention, my husband is kind and loving, but does not have my spiritual practices so he does not share these concerns. Which makes me even more fearful because I refuse for him to try one bite of this.
Please help me <3